Post ID 790

Posted by on May 14, 2020

“She decided to trust what she felt, to know what she knew, and to dare to imagine an unseen order where she might be free.” Glennon Doyle

Like so many others, I recently enjoyed Glennon Doyle’s latest book, “Untamed”. This was the first book of hers that I’ve read, and the promise of women’s empowerment drew me in. 

Part memoir and part personal growth book, she offers honest highlights from her recent life and helps readers share in her lessons learned. I was hooked from her prologue, ‘Cheetah’, which also cued her anecdotal and metaphorical writing style. This opening also introduced the powerful message of her book – the importance of accessing and trusting ourselves.

I cannot emulate her words, which I encourage you to read for yourself. Instead, I’ll share just a small part of her work to give you a sneak peek of her wisdom and inspire you to apply her advice to your own life, as I have done to mine with great success. 

4 Keys to Freedom

My favourite is ‘part 2’ of her book, where she shares her 4 keys to freedom. It especially rang true for me because it’s a similar approach to how I help women make, trust and follow through on decisions. 

Here’s a brief summary of how your emotions, intuition, imagination and courage – that you may have learned to hide to keep others comfortable – will help you return to who you are.

1) Feel It All – “Feelings are for Feeling”.

Feel everything, especially the painful emotions, rather than distracting or numbing from them. You can be free from the fear of feeling pain, if not from the pain itself. You can become the woman you’re meant to be next by venturing into the feelings you have now. 

2) Be Still and Know – “If you just stop doing, you’ll start knowing.”

Instead of looking to everyone and everything else for answers, look within yourself. Ask yourself the big questions in life, go within to where your Self, wisdom, intuition or God lives and await the subtle nudge toward your next right action. The more consistently, bravely and precisely you follow your ‘Knowing’, the more beautiful your life becomes. 

3) Dare to Imagine – “Perhaps imagination is not where we go to escape reality, but where we go to remember it.”

You must first imagine on the inside what you wish to create on the outside. If you feel discontent, it’s your imagination trying to get your attention by whispering ‘not this but that instead’. To honour your dreams, write them out for yourself answering: What is the truest, most beautiful story about my life that I could imagine?

4) Let It Burn – “We must be committed to holding on to nothing but the truth.”

If you want to create something new for yourself, you must be willing to release what is no longer true for you. It may feel ‘safer’ or ‘good enough’ to stay as you are, but you would lose everything that was meant to be and you are worth more than that. In doing so, you will be full of what is true for you in this moment – neither right nor wrong – and you can revise that with what’s more beautiful for you until infinity.

Which of these 4 keys will you practice to move closer to your most free and authentic life?

Freedom in Relationships

So what could this look like when practically applied? Yes, you can use these steps in all areas of your life. Let’s use the example of a challenging personal relationship that you’re not sure how to handle. 

  • Allow yourself to feel (express and release) your emotions about the relationship, whether you’re feeling sad, worried, guilty, angry or even loving.
  • Be still with yourself, go inward to that place within you where your true Self resides and await the nudge about your next step.
  • Imagine or write out your story about what the truest, most beautiful (not necessarily easiest or happiest) version of this relationship would be. Use this to inform your actions.
  • Begin to release what is no longer helpful to you in the relationship. Let go of the ‘could have beens’ to make space for the healthier version of the relationship. 

This works beyond relationships too. I’ve practiced all four keys to successfully navigate a stressful decision about where to live, and can assure you it works. It was a bonus to learn that I could follow this process myself, and my husband (the other person involved in the decision) could follow his own process, and together we came to a great resolution. 

So until you have a chance to read ‘Untamed’ if I’ve inspired you to do so, keep Glennon’s words at hand to help you be brave enough to set yourself free . . . 

“Breathe. Don’t panic and flee. Sink. Feel it all. Be still. Imagine. Let it Burn.”

Post ID 562

Posted by on February 16, 2018

I don’t know about you, but my February has been a whirlwind and I’m so looking forward to this weekend, and the Family Day holiday on Monday, to rest, refresh and regroup. And this has reminded me of a favourite self-care practice that I thought you’d like to try for yourself.

As much as I think it’s essential to have dreams and desires to strive for, I think it’s equally important to enjoy those things that you want most tomorrow, as part of your daily life today. 

Rather than wait until “some day”, how can you experience what you really want in life – now?

So to give yourself exactly what you need for a little self-care this weekend, follow these 3 simple steps to enjoy your desires today . . .

1) Think about what you wish to experience in the future – your hopes, dreams and desires. Or keep it simple, and think about what you want to experience or feel this weekend. “I want . . . “

2) Consider where you already have that experience or feeling in your life, or where you have enjoyed it in the past. “I already have this experience when I . . .”

3) Find ways to enhance these experiences in your life today. Start enjoying more of these things now. “I will . . .”

Bonus tip: You don’t even have to have this all planned out. By simply knowing your desired experience or feeling, you can make choices moment to moment about whether an action will allow you to experience your desire or not.

It’s a simple practice, and it works. It’s a great way to focus on what you want, and to take a little break from working through what you don’t want. It reminds you of what’s working for you in your life and all that you have to be grateful for. It makes your dreams seem that much more attainable and you may realized you’re much closer to reaching your goals that you realized. You may even notice that what you want seems to be “magically” appearing before your eyes, as if by serendipity.

So for example, this weekend I want to have lots of fun! I feel like I need a change of scenery and to focus on my family and non-work related activities. I already have fun when I’m playing with my kids, enjoying a movie night, hanging out with friends and am active outside. Therefore, I will get out with and host some friends, reconnect with my husband, splurge on a few days of skiing, visit with my in-laws and unwind and regroup for the week ahead. And you can bet I’ll be open to random opportunities for fun! (Like watching the bald eagle that’s sitting on the ice out front of my house right now – not kidding, I just looked up and saw it – and then checking out “eagle symbolism”, which I like to do for fun.)

Whatever your mood or desires may be, you’ll discover this practice is a great way to tap into the kind of self-care that you need most. So if you crave quiet, how can you experience more of that? Maybe you want to be productive, so how can you amp up your productive energy? Or maybe you want more love in your life, so you’ll tune into the love you already experience and be open to even more. That’s what I was doing on Valentine’s Day, and a few of the things I found are in the photos below.

If you’d love to connect with me about experiencing even more of what you want in your life, just request a free Clarity Call with me.

So, what do you want to feel this weekend, when have you experienced this in the past, and how will you enjoy it today?

Have fun!

Posted in: Freedom

Post ID 600

Posted by on November 3, 2017

There are about 2 months left in 2017.

Around 8 weeks. Nearly 60 days.

What goals or plans do you have left to finish up (or start) this year?

It’s not too late. 

Two months doesn’t seem like a very long time, especially as we enter into the busy holiday season. Even I could almost be convinced to write off any remaining plans for the year, and instead start fresh in the new year.

Almost, but not quite. . .

I know what I can do in 2 months. When I sat down to write the draft of this email to you, I was reminded. It all came flowing out of my pen and onto paper where I can’t deny it. Maybe you could try this too to remind yourself of where you’ve been.

There is so much of life to EXPERIENCE in 2 months!

In the two months since my family and I moved from our old home to our new one, together with my husband I’ve:

  • Moved us and our personal belongings into our new home;
  • Settled back into the school routine and embraced the flow of country living;
  • Sorted through every container and corner of our house and donated, sold, trashed or boxed up our belongings for storage;
  • Finished so many unfinished to-dos in our former house – painted, caulked, replaced, scrubbed and fixed (why do we wait ’til we’re moving to do this?!);
  • Coordinated extra-curricular activities – after school sports, piano, play dates, nature time, Halloween and special events;
  • Connected with loved ones and hosted dinners, sleepovers, birthdays, Thanksgivings, beach parties and walks on the beach;
  • Enjoyed family time, just the 4 of us – swam in the giant waves, fished in the river, hiked through the trails, biked along the roads, built a fort in the bush and basked by the bonfire;
  • Maintained my business (admittedly at a relaxed pace);
  • Squeezed in some solo self-care time (the reason all of this happened);
  • And kept up with all the regular stuff too – cleaned, cooked, maintained, parented and so on;
  • Learned so much about myself, my family and our lives in the process;
  • And have experienced more moments of wonder and awe in just two months than I have in years – the daily changing beauty of Lake Superior; the wild animals who are my neighbours;  the starry, moonlit and meteorite-filled sky; the sublime change of seasons from summer to fall and toward winter . . .

Could I have done this alone? No, but I could have done at least half and that still would have been impressive.

Am I tired? Yes, very and ready for the next phase (we’re not meant to “produce” all the time).

Am I happy? YES! I wouldn’t have done it any other way.

I don’t share this to boast. I want to exemplify what we as women so often fail to do. We usually skip the pause, the reflection, the celebration. Instead, we rush ahead with our next steps and focus only on our never-ending to-do lists. Let’s stop doing that.  Let’s just stop – and breathe.

I don’t share this to brag. Like many of you, I struggle with “visibility” and am overcoming my life-long tendency to keep myself small, play it safe and avoid putting myself out there. But that’s such a waste. Let’s just be ourselves. 

Instead, I share it to show you how long 2 months really are and how much can be experienced  – when you’re on the right path for you – when you’re motivated by your heart’s truest desires – when you’re living each day in the way that makes you feel fulfilled and free. 

This is what I want for you!

As we look to November and December, think of all you want to be, do and have. Think of all that could be.

What would you most like to accomplish or experience this year so that you’re on your way to living your own version of fulfillment, fun and freedom?

Not sure what you want or how to proceed? Book a free Clarity call with me to get clear on where you’re at, your next steps, and how I can support you in making them happen.

2 months. 8 weeks. 60 days.

That’s plenty of time for you to make some magic happen!

Posted in: Freedom
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